Thursday, February 11, 2010

A Lexus in the Bedroom

Parts of a Western SaddleImage via Wikipedia

Last night I slept on a new mattress pad, one made of memory foam. I'm not sure what I was expecting, though the television commercial with a couple in matching pajamas and a glass of wine comes to mind. He's sitting cross-legged, smiling and watching her jump up and down on the mattress next to him, while the glass of wine rests benignly at the foot of the bed. Apparently, the space-age foam is supposed to absorb motion so that one sleeper doesn't disturb the other, as depicted by the wine glass that remains upright.

Not wishing to have to change the sheets, I didn't try the wine part. Since it was only a pad and made of cheaper material than the one advertised, I thought it wise not to push my luck. Aside from that, I slept rather well. The idea that I should
awaken in the same position I fell asleep was a bust -- that's only happened to me on a water bed, anyway. The cat and dog also fared pretty well, it seems. There's much less prowling and growling this morning, suggesting they awoke feeling "alert and refreshed." I should write the manufacturer and offer their endorsement; maybe we'll get a commission large enough to pay for the thing.

I contemplated the mattress version, by the way, having sank deeply into o
ne while visiting a patient in a local hospital last year. Her roommate had been discharged and the only chair in the room was occupied by my partner, so I took a seat on the empty bed. "Sank" is definitely the word because I quickly found myself wrapped in foam nearly to my waist. It reminded me of an old time Western saddle with a high cantle and wide swells (see photo), designed to keep a cowboy on the wildest bucking horse. Despite the temptation, I refrained from breaking into song, "Oh, give me a home, where the buffalo roam..." It just seemed a bit out of place.

At any rate, that was my only previous experience with this kind of thing, but since my pad came from a discount store, I assumed it would be lower tech to begin with. Still in all, as you can tell, I wasn't disappointed. I didn't feel drawn into the tender embrace of luxury, but it doesn't make sense to anticipate the comfort of a Lexus from a Honda Civic. You get what you pay for and I was willing to be understanding. I figured the least I could do was give it a chance. Besides, if I'd wanted a "Lexus" in the bedroom, I'd have had to repaint to make it feel at home and all I needed was a better night's sleep.


(Home on the Range, words by Brewster M. Higley, music by Daniel E. Kelley, arranged by David Guion; Public Domain image via Wikipedia)

(Note to the reader: the photo depicts a modern Western saddle with the parts labeled rather than the older style mentioned in the text.)
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